Thomas Gataker and the Right Attitude About Humanity

I read recently in a quote from Thomas Gataker in the book Puritan Profiles by William Barker,

"I thirst for thirstiness; I weep for tears;
Well pleased am I to be displeased thus;
The thing I fear is want of fear;
Suspecting I am not suspicious.

I cannot choose but to live, because I die;
And when I am not dead, how glad am I;
Yet, when I am thus glad for sense of pain,
And careful am, lest I should careless be;
Then do I grieve for being glad again,
And fear lest carelessness take care from me.

Amid these restless thoughts this rest I find.
For those who rest not here, there's rest behind."

-Thomas Gataker

This is the life of a believer. This is how I feel half of the time. Torn between gladness and sorrow. Split between careful and careless. Thirsting to be thirsty and not get lacadaisical. Weeping because I cannot weep for what I ought to be weeping for. I cannot make myself love those whom I ought, give what I ought, serve as I ought, and it causes a rift between the flesh and the spirit. Oh thank God for Jesus, the only way to love, serve, and give. It is Jesus to whom we lift praises saying with Paul,

"Oh wretched man that I am, who will deliver me from this body of death? Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord!" (Romans 7:24-25)

Exalting In The Hope Of His Glory,
R.D. Thompson